Home Sweet Home

when I was a child and young America is like moon.Only the blessed would born there or go there.Whenever Sarada aunty comes from "Fhoren'(Foriegn) we children stare her with admiration as if she just landed from heaven.her wristwatch ( which is a rare commodity for many indians) ,her 644 foriegn silk saries, her big suitecase everything is a piece of exibition. "Oh they don't get mirchi and Rai over there!" We wonder how people can live? Her children never spoke Telugu which I admired.Their Enlish with accent is like tilting instrumental music in my ears. Ever since I nourished a dream that i should live in a place where people,language,climate,food everything are alien. I wanted to live in a farthest place possible far from this "madind crowd who allways poke at others life,these muddy roads, mosquitoes,low voltage energy ever ending slogan "GareebiHatao". I was so dismissive never sentimental never spoke high of my country"s rich culture or past.If anybody talked high of India and sarcastic about the life and human relations of abroad I loathed.



But in those days it is only few blessed who could make to Foriegn. Mainly scientists,few engineers and Doctors.So i despised my life for not allowing me to go over there and I hated my self for not able to fight for the things I wanted.



Married to a man of Gove service it was a unfullfilled dream which i could never persue.Still not giving up my hope I tried to persue my husband to take up a job in America or atleast in Europe. He gave me stern look and added with a voice colder than ice " You can choose your friends but not your parents. I donont want to be a second rate citizen in a country however prosperous and developed it is" I sulked for three days To increase my misery the maid and cook were absent. Troubling with one year old child and workload I found it so irritable to see my neighbour. But seeing me in such hopeless condition she said in a smooth voice " Don't worry I will send the Sambhar you just cook rice." Prbably first time in my life I felt this country is not that bad to live.



Now I have sent my daughter to America . Now America is second home for me. In my first visit I was enthralled by its developement,displine,time sense,hardworking nature,and down to earth attitude.. I enjoyed my long walks on clean but deserted roads, I loved spic and span houses, orderly traffic,water plenty and clean, no powercuts,the food rich and healthy, the life with full of spirit and enthusiasm. Wonder where have gone my arthritis and broanchoital problems!

After my first visit I never wanted to get back.., On my second I felt miserable for my country for not achieveing 1/4th of what these people have even after sixtyyears of independence, My third one was boring.Now I feel home sick. I donot know whether it is because I think differently or just for years I got used to aparticular way of life.No doubt we donot have half the comforts what these people enjoy,But we have people for every occassion , we donot e-mail or take appointment from the person stays just in front of our house.Our children need not have playdates to engage themselves. The colonies never deserted ,the neighbours ever helping.

Amidst my daughter's large luxorious house with all the modern fecilities I remembered the uncontrolable and indiciplined traffic,mosquitoes,those horrible hornhonks,loud loud speakers,the pollution-but everything seemed wonderfull much closed to heart. I miss my movies,petty T.V shows,biased news papers,crowded roads,gorgeous and colurfull weddings,soulfulmournings above all my people who are happy with meagre salaries,with smal things,little comforts, crookrd politicians, and countlessGods.

America is good But the life is like calander.Day and dates change-no soul. I remember my husband's words. May be I choose my parents in my next birth.

Passing on torch

They say with age you grow.I feel we change.the ideas and views we cherrish at the age of sixten or eighteen may not look very stupid but with a different angle. I loved Ranganayakamma when I was in school,Chelam when I was in college, Maugham and Russel when i just married, when I made friendship with Rao he opened doors for Aynrand Whom I adored,Albertcamu then I swithed over to Sartre and James Jyoce. Now I eegross reading Khaleed Hossein, Robinsharma Orhanpumak and MitchAlbom a new genre writers.



When I was sixteen Inever liked Joint family system now I love to see my children bond so well meet often gather for festivals I feel whole heartedly that this is the way the life should be. I grumbled when my husband was genarous with his kith and kin, sharing everything with his siblings and went out of way to help others in need. Now I try in my own small ways try to help others. It gives me immence pleasure and I realize this is the essence of life!



I remember when My daughter was "Fida' over Ameer Khan after seeing His first movie. With a restrained face I mentioned "Did you watch Kamal Hassan?" she did not bother to here me even. When she decided to marry a person of her choice I remember grumbling "are you sure ? you have a fabulous future." she said light heartedly " Don"t worry mamma I know what I want. After ten year of marriage when she complained about his attitude it is me again saying " O.K did you ever try to change your attitude and fit into his shoes?" forgetting I never did that in my forty years of married life .Poor man it is allways he who has put up with me!



Now my daughter is forty with a teen age son. We both share a lot of things..Sitting happilly on a couch listening Soulfull voice of Debojit Dutta on Saregamapa we heard a bikering voice from behind.Anirudh her son shouting " what stupid programmes you watch ya let us swith over to Manchester vs chelsi soccer match". My daughter turned and gave him a frowned look " You must develope good taste for Music" she murmured. With an irritable look anirudh slaped the door. But I am sure! May be after thirty years Anirudh will love what we said and repeat the same!

"THE CHOSEN"

Finally the messaiah has arrived!! Ofcourse "Barak"means the chosen in Arabic.How aptly suited! By the way who are happy with his winning?Naturally the Afro Americans(95%), Hispanians(45%),Indian Americans or the American Indians? What about the Americans. I meanthe real white Americans?Are they happy?I have seen many Americans gathering with over welhming emotion,tears in their eyes for his winning speech at chicago.When i looked at them iwas little confused-are they really so desparate with Bush administration?or simply mesmorised by his oration and charm Or are they really come out of that stigma "we are white."No body likes to let loose their tredition or legacy.Are we indians have come out of the stigma of accepting any other than Nehru-Gandhi clan as our leader?

This time the Broadley effect did't work. Still I think the white Americ is with Mccaine only.Oh poor Mccaine and Sarah I pity you! One could not chase Obama due to his age (NOw it is no moreRasism It is ageism)the other with poor global knowledge

Wow A real Global president! Born to a kenyan raised by an American, Had his elementory Education in Asia,having a middle name of Middle East!Japaneese are happy ( i do not know Why?0 Indonasians are happy because he studied there,asusual Indians are very,bery,very happy because they allways think the otherside of fence is green moreover Kashmere is very happy because he has a middle name "Hussain" Amerecans are happy They are with a big hope Obama has answers for their falling economy,growing unemployment, and aftermath of Iraq war, But they donot know one thing The politicians does not have Magic stick they have only mesmorising voices.

America voted for change. Change! The world is changing. Suffered, supressed,downtroden are making it big by their hardwork and perseverence. Is Mayavathi next in the line?